What should I DO at the table? In a word...

OK....You have had your child checked by a good and reputable team to rule out GI disorders and other medical based issues that can derail successful eating. Your child has no swallowing problems, no airway problems, no GI issues and no major nutritional issues. Maybe some mild sensory issues, but nothing major. The dietitian has told you that things are not that bad and you are actually dealing with persistent pickiness only... Now, what should you do?

NOTHING.
Let me say it again...NOTHING.

Now most of you and shaking your heads and getting ready to pull your hair out, but I will tell you after doing this for 24 years, that is the best advice I can give you. Stop thinking about it all the time. Offer food on a plate, offer a variety of food, use the ideas of food chaining of offering food similar to what your child already eats and build on tastes, textures and help teach and offer learning opportunities for your child but at the table? Do NOTHING.

You cannot, should not and will not succeed by taking control of another person's eating. You must offer food/liquids on a schedule that helps stimulate appetite and then... eat your meal, talk about anything else but how your child is eating, take the words "take a bite" out of your vocabulary and leave the child to decide what to eat or not to eat. Understand child portions and eating patterns. Most kids don't eat well and vegetables are an acquired tastes. Ultimately, it is the child's decision to eat that matters.

If he chooses poorly, he experiences hunger. There are some kids who do not feel hunger or have dysphagia, but that is why the medical feeding team is needed to identify those kids and a different set of intervention strategies are needed for problem eaters. But uncomplicated picky? Do NOTHING.

Pressure does not work. Force does not work because it will always turn around and bite you in the end. Providing is your job. Eating is the child's job. Do not give the child the spotlight at the table, don't let them pull your strings by how they eat each day. Calm yourself as much as possible. Go scream in the backyard if you need to, but don't feed into this. Pun intended.

The true picky eater without problems is out there and most of them come out of it on their own. The problem eater needs our help. There is a difference. But picky can become problematic and emotional and stress laden and behavioral. Don't let it. There is power and action in restraint. Deep breath. This too shall pass.